It's Society's Sins to Sun Tzu Thing

Dear America,

"Right is right 

even when nobody is doing it; 

wrong is wrong 

even when everybody's doing it."

Quote captured from an old episode of No Reservations.

Bourdain didn't say it, of course; 

it was said during a guest interview of

a rancher, somewhere in Montana

...sorry I can't give you a name.

you know, a number of years ago, while attending a wine fest at Liberty Station in Point Loma, my girlfriend and I met the owners of a few of the Massage Envy's around town -- a husband and wife team...

although he rubbed me the wrong way (badump ba), she, on the other hand, was a stand up kinda gal.  (I know, that was a two-fer-one.)

But this news of 180 sexual assault allegations -- what the buzz?

so one of these women, if maybe all, kinda allowed the rub to wander inappropriately and didn't just get up and run out, right on the spot?  Seriously?

I'm trying to imagine that -- for if it were me, from the very second hands would grope anything....from my little itty bitty buttocks to my little itty bitty tata's, I would be screaming bloody hell and running to the front desk!  I mean, even engaging in reading the entire BuzzFeed piece --as graphic as it is --  is difficult.

And guessing it is no wonder, for duly noted in the post --  the Massage Envy manual claims, "Only 4% of upset customers will tell you when there is a problem."

Um, I don't believe that this is a problem resolved by a free massage or getting your money back, just sayin'.

But for this news to be surfacing at the tail end of such a glorious Thanksgiving weekend....

and when commingled with the news of a couple more high profile guys  (Conyers and Branson), now allegedly guilty of sexual harassment and the like....

and when added to the last few months and a trail of catching tail a mile long -- beginning with Harvey Weinstein --  it feels as if no man stands clear of charges. 

It also feels like a whole lot of women have been way too silent while sitting on a ticking time bomb, and for what?  Why be silent?  As a girl, I do not understand that kind of fear to speak up....after being sexually assaulted!  Suddenly feeling a pang in my upper shoulders and a tightening at the nape of the neck.

I do not understand how one can continue to lay there on a massage table and not high tail it outta of there, while dialing 911, and promptly having the dude arrested on the spot.  In this day and age of social media news going viral -- where's the post?  Where's the alert to the media?  Where's the telling all Facebook friends, all Instagram followers, the latest news?  Thing is, how is it now fall of 2017 while the beginning of Massage Envy's demise -- courtesy of James Deiter, and others  -- began in the fall of 2014?

If the Richard Branson incident, in question, occurred in 2010 -- just how does Antonia Jenae not say a thing until now?

Thing is -- and it's a pretty big thing -- how does an entire hand go up where it doesn't belong received without incident, as in without the return of a swift kick to the groin?  That's just nuts.  Suddenly experiencing a Charley Horse piercing my entire left side, all the way down from my sciatic nerve to the big toe.

Which all leads me to the new book I'm reading for kicks and giggles:  The Art of War by SunTzu, translated by Lionel Giles.  Thinking it wise to take it slow, perhaps with a heating pad on the lower back; for this guy packs so much with so few words.   word.

But just maybe my inner feminist is telling me that women are in a new age of fighting back or playing the victim....it appears out of nowhere like a fine line; -- and just to be clear, this gal doesn't align with feminism in the way true feminists behave and have their origins, okay.  I simply believe strong women -- the kind resembling female strength and conviction and drive -- have existed since the beginning of time.  True feminists, real women,  just DO; there is no need for political agenda, no need for special treatment, no need for exclusivity that runs lock step with Leftists, no need for lambasting half the women in the country just because they lean conservative...but look how quickly we digress.

So, in the first two pages, Sun Tzu says: 

 "18. All warfare is based on deception."

and adding:

 "19. Hence, when able to attack, we must seem unable; when using our forces, we must seem inactive; when we are near, we must make the enemy believe we are far away; when far away, we must make him believe we are near."

and adding just one more:

"20. Hold out baits to entice the enemy.  

Feign disorder, and crush him."

And in this light, may boys and girls begin to recognize that being in relationship with one another -- especially in business -- is sometimes complicated, to say the least; but sad is the day we become enemies -- or worse --  that women begin to use our skill sets of deception and manipulation, using our feminine ways to alter realities in an effort to make our way in a man's world, and turn around to use it as leverage or blackmail; and in equal portion -- for the masculine world to taunt and take whatever they want, whenever they want, unable to keep their hands to themselves or coexist with any semblance of mutual respect and honor with the opposite sex.  Having said that: consent should look and act like clear consent; and the same goes for the other way around.

But we are not enemies, boys and girls; we are on the same side of society as a whole.  The yin and the yang, the forces of masculine and feminine, are dependent upon each other for many things (especially that of reproduction xox).  This relationship between the sexes demands that we respect it, protect it, nurture it, and honor it.... in order to ensure a healthy longevity; and perhaps most important, we must teach it to our children, with each new generation.

To steal a line from a really good movie, He's Just Not That Into You:  "If a guy treats you like he genuinely doesn't give a crap, he genuinely doesn't give a crap."  And likewise, if a girl dresses like a tart, she will be treated like a tart....and so on and so on.  Respect and responsibility go hand in hand.

We all have a responsibility to make it work; and taking the high road in all situations, in all interactions, seems to be the crying, bellowing nature of the day...and without question, calling out to each and every one of us to pay attention.  Nobody is immune, it could happen in a nano-second, so be prepared!  Be completely loaded up and ready to stand on the side of conviction and moral courage.  And then get up the next day prepared to do it all over again.

This is really a war as old as time; good and evil does not get along peacefully, okay?  It never has and it never will.  We must be prepared to fight, but please, fight fair for every inch of mutual respect; we must live with integrity, respective of the golden rules, dating back to the golden child, from one golden sunrise to the next.

Much like the Art of War, some advice is just timeless, priceless, and unmatched -- no matter how old it is, no matter what new age we may be experiencing as a country -- as a boy or a girl in an ever-changing world.

I just love how certain Sun Tzu is..."14. By means of these seven considerations I can forecast victory or defeat.   15.  The general that hearkens to my counsel and acts upon it, will conquer: -- let such a one be retained in command! The general that hearkens not to my counsel nor acts upon it, will suffer defeat:  -- let such a one be dismissed!"

That is powerful stuff. (And to think, it's only chapter one!  yippee skippy)

I'm puzzled and conflicted and upset and all tied up in knots over the scope of our sexual dysfunction in society;  but as sure as Sun Tzu says in certain (say that ten times fast), this problem is not only revealing deep-seated societal woes and liabilities, it is giving us a warning shot across the bow. It points the way towards a certain truth -- that for a society to remain solid and good depends upon the attention and retention of all that is good and mighty and disciplined and morally right, otherwise we fall.  And it can be swift. 

Oh, this girl didn't want to start back up with this little itty bitty diary on such a sordid note.  It kinda breaks my heart.  But here we are anyway, in a day that wraps warm blankets and soft music around a sordid tale and somehow, or other, wanders right into the opening strategies of Sun Tzu.  Go hourglass figure under the sheets :).

Hope you all had a beautiful time with family and friends over the holiday -- so grateful to be surrounded with men who treat women with nothing but respect and honor and love. And just as an afterthought, may the last thing you do today is be online x teehee x   wait it out for just one more day and rest in the spirit of thanksgiving for just a wee bit longer, you will thank me. 

See you real soon.

Make it a Good Day, G